Neverland

You know how they say that an ugly duckling will one day turn into a lovely swan? This was what they use to tell us as a child. It is nothing but a complete lie, I didn't turn into one, because I turned out to be a human being. I'm not being a pessimist on this one. Just trying to dwell in my thoughts of idleness in this 2 days of bum life. As a kid I didn't really care about how I'd look and dress up. I was just a little girl running free in this world with nothing to worry about, well except asking permission from my dad to get a puppy. Don't you ever wish that time would just stop there? Your world should be immobile once you become a kid, just stop evolving, be stuck in that phase. Wouldn't it be less complicated? Those days when you get really excited the day after your last stay in school that signifies the start of summer vacation. Climbing up the Aratilis Tree to get those mini treats for free. When being dirty and stinky is not such a shameful thing because you are allowed to be in that state. And that nap time is our worst enemy because we feel it's such a waste to lend your time doing it. Growing up is the worst thing that could happen to you. I should've believed them when they told me this when I was still a kid who can't wait to grow up. When you grow out of innocence there is really nothing to look forward to anymore. I used to believe that there is much more freedom in your adult years, but now looking back, I'd rather be stuck in my 9 year old self. When summer days used to be so long and that boredom can't even kill me. Superficial things amaze me that even the sight of my school uniform stuck in my closet makes me happy. What ever happened to those good old summer days? I badly want and need it back. I just want to be careless again without having to worry about its results. Those days when you don't even give a fuck how long you stayed in the pool and how you'd look the day after that. Those days when mom decides on the style of hair you'd get, you just don't care. Hearing the ice cream vendor makes you giddy and you feel butterflies in your tummy as you ask your parents for money. Why isn't life like this anymore? Do we also grow out of it, freedom and happiness? Once responsibilities pile up, there's really nothing much left to do to keep you happy. 

I need a break... a longer break. I need more idleness.

-Nel